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Sunday, August 17, 2008

Do you wonder what your kids will be when they grow up?

I have often thought about this, and wondered what things they will be doing in the future, what that future may hold for them.....how things that I am teaching them will affect them in the future.....if I did things right or wrong.....I guess this is really coming about because in 9 days my eldest is leaving for college, and I wonder if I have instilled all the values that I want her to have in her....and even if I did, will they stick, will she remember them? I know what a big bad scary world it is out there, and know she has to be let out of the nest to fly on her own, but one cannot help but wonder.....did I do right by her......I guess the only thing you can do as a parent is hope and pray you did and then let them falter and just be there for them to pick up the pieces when something bad happens.....not that you are hoping something bad happens but you kwim.....my oldest son has always wanted to be a paleontologist....since he was 3....and 10 years later it is still what he wants to do, and I have no doubts that if he puts his mind to it, he will succeed in that area......my second daughter.....well she is not sure what she wants to do it varies from a doctor, to a store owner, to whatever strikes her fancy that day......BUT I do have to say she is the one I am most looking forward to seeing what she will become......because 3.5 years ago she was hit by a car.....and that had to be the most scary thing in the world as a parent just knowing it was your child that was just hit.....somehow someway *I* knew it was going to be her in the street when I opened the door....no matter how many times I said "please let it be a dog, please let it be a dog" something deep down inside me KNEW it was her....sure enough there she was laying in the street not moving.....I can close my eyes to this day and remember it so clearly....and the saying "it gets easier with time" is a load of shit!!! no it doesn't!!! when I let myself dare to even think of that day, it still hurts like crazy, I can still feel all the emotion that I did that day....but I digress...she was sent down to Seattle for observation, because thankfully a very astute dr was working the ER and noticed a crack in her skull right behind her ear....and because of that she was airlifted to Seattle where they have a pediatrics intensive care unit.....so my baby girl all of the age of 6 was gone from me for a few days....it seemed like forever because an almost 8 month along pregnant woman was not allowed to travel with her daughter....it was not until she came home to us, that she asked us "if God wears shorts and sunglasses?" so being ever so curious as to what she was talking about I asked her "why, I am sure he can wear whatever he wants too" she then proceeded to tell us that when she was hit by the car and laying there motionless in the street (as I was shaking her to wake up) she saw God, and where she was was so beautiful and peaceful and quiet.....and he told her that "he was not finished with her yet, she had to go back" so she did, and the next thing she remembers is me sitting there on the ground with her and yelling at her to WAKE UP!!! she opened her eyes and tried to get up, but could not....THANK GOD everything is fine with her and she has no real scars from it....but that takes me to the "I cannot wait to see what she becomes, and what she does in this world" because God sent her back to us and told her he was not finished with her yet.....so for me who truly believes in God and believes her and KNOWS that he spoke to her, I just am impatiently waiting for her to grow up and become whatever it is she is meant to be and do.....its not that I do not care what my other kids will do and become, but I just have a feeling that she was meant for something far greater than what I am or ever hoped to be.....

my two youngest....they vary between a princess, a bowser...(don't ask he is from Mario) policeman, nurse, doctor, and whatever strikes their fancy on that given point in time....you know how it is with a 5 year old and a 3 year old....but I still cannot wait to see what all of them become when they do grow up and leave me and my house......but thankfully I have a few more years before I have to go thru all of this again!!!!! 5 to be exact.....then college, life in the big bad world starts all over again for the next in line....so when you are so eager for your kids to grow up and move out.....enjoy the time you have with them....because in the blink of an eye they go from 3 years old to 18 and leaving you......and to tell the truth that is NO PICNIC at all!!!! THEY (whoever they are) never told me how hard this was going to be!!!

2 comments:

Minxy Mimi said...

Awww, Wendi, you made me teary. I think your kids are here to do important things, but I have to say not more important than what you are here for. Raising 5 wonderful children with morals, who care and who are strong is important. If they did not have you and your hubby, they would not be able to rise to thier full potential. YAY Wendi!!!

Debateur said...

That must be such a scary thing watching you child leave home but honestly Wendi you're a great Mom and you daughter is going to make out just fine.